Fresh Air

What a beautiful day it is turning out to be. The sky is perfect the breeze is blowing. Yeah, it's going to be hot, but don't most days hold something we'd like to change. It's the day I set aside for going to the gym. I need to do that, I want to do that, but today that would have added more stress. I decided to enjoy the beauty outside instead. I spent 30 minutes walking this morning. Time alone, time with God. I needed the break. I needed the time to cry out and say "help". The world is crashing in around, so much is needed to be done, so much I want to do. Yet at the center of that I know that if God is not first in my life, the rest will be even more of a mess. Amazing what 30 minutes of talking with the Saviour can do. Not only did I come home refreshed and ready to focus in on the day. I came home knowing that it's ok if our son does not do Scouts. An email confirmed that this is not the right thing for us right now. Doesn't mean that Scouts isn't a great thing, just that our famiy can not and will not do it all, and for Zach hockey is his thing right now. I came back knowing that I need to make a list of all I am involved with and find a way to cross some things off.

I want so desperately to be a part of my kids lives. This is a time when I can be involved in their classrooms, in their schools. Just the same it does not mean that either of them will suffer if I'm not the "room parent". I can't do it. Maybe next year, but if I'm asked this year the answer has to be NO. I will come to parties, but I can not plan them. Do the kids even really care who plans them? They just want to know we are there to support them, and love them.

I set time aside to be in my bible, to be studying the Word. A phone call naturally came as soon as I sat down, but in answering it I soon found more peace about the hockey meeting I went to last night. In 15 minutes today I have found that what needs to be done has gotten done already, that the other mother and I are both more at peace about what is to go on, and that the Coach is able to meet tonight after practice. I found a person willing to give time out of her day to calm my fears. It didn't just happen, God is there saying "hush, and be still" take time for me first and the rest will fall into place.

Yes, I'm still over committed. Sometimes being a responsible, wanting to be involved person does that. Now, I'm going to seek out what God is requiring of me, and letting go of those things that are not needed. I think it's in Philippians, where it says "everything is permissible, but not everything is good". Just because it's available does not mean it needs to be done by me or my family.

Praise God for the beautiful, fresh air that pulled me outside for the walk. In a gym I may have taken the time to focus on Him and seek out that peace, but outside the distractions will limited and the peace that I prayed for came.